FAWM Blog #2: Full speed ahead

You can find my up-to-date FAWM page here:
http://fawm.org/fawmers/emkeev

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I've been tracking roughly a song a day.

Practical consequences:

• Eating has taken a hit. I now consume one giant meal per day, with little snackies all around. The problem is not the having of food. The problem is that I will write a song for several consecutive hours and during that time, I leave the mortal realm altogether. Exaggeration or not - except for extreme circumstances, I have no concept of hunger or physical needs during the time I'm writing songs.
  
• Sleep has taken a hit, but that's nothin' new.
  
• Eyelids have begun to twitch.
  
• "I can't, I have to write a song" has become a standard excuse for not doing something.
  
• The house is only marginally more dirty, as I have managed to keep pace with most of the mess.
  
• I'M SO HAPPY.
  

I wrote two instrumentals. Earth and Sky (mp3) is electronically composed. I was so tired and hungry when I uploaded it (extreme circumstance) that I dissolved into a fit of self-loathing, tore it down, and went to sleep. I felt better when I woke up, so I put it back up. All's well. I had fun writing it, though, honestly. I think my main damage was that I hadn't really decided what the song was about. Even if there's no lyric, a song (to me) needs a direction, a thought, something to tie it together. So I ended up with what I think of as a song with multiple personalities. But I do like it.

Then there was "Waltz for a Clementine." (youtube)



I opted to make a video because I wanted folks to experience this really cool instrument. My performance is a little heavy-handed because I was just flat-out enjoying myself. I do like the piece itself. It's honestly not at all what I was expecting to write - I originally picked up the guitar and the notebook and ended up with a dulcimer tune with no words. Go figure. The title's from something I heard yesterday at the dance... one of my friends was waltzing around with lemonade and then told the story of another friend who was waltzing with a clementine... I knew the title was "Waltz for a" something, and Clementine just seemed to fit.

I love my dancing friends. Have I said that recently? I'm thrilled they're a part of my life. I went yesterday to the Arden contra dance, alone, having neglected to try to coerce anyone into joining me due to the busy times of FAWMing. But when I got there, I was joined by some good people from New Jersey and then we met with another good person in Philly and life was just... really... good.

I also really enjoy musicking with Matthew Halley, who did a really awesome collab with me this evening. He's adding a little folk harp and throwing it together soon. It's gonna be sweet. We've jammed a handful of times over the last month and it's been great having another detail-oriented music person to bounce stuff off of.

Speaking of bouncing - I'mma bounce to bed.

FAWM Blog #1: Three songs, radio interview, focus, energy

You can find my up-to-date FAWM page here: http://fawm.org/fawmers/emkeev

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A little backlogging before I get to the songs: Todd Chappelle and I were on Graffiti Radio on Tuesday (January 30). The podcast is available here. Mike Nigro's a fun guy to get interviewed by, and Todd's a great guy to have on your team. Team FAWM. Team what the heck is this mess oh yeah FAWM.

I got made fun of for saying "word." I thought the mic was off. It was right before a commercial break. I don't know if it came through, but Todd thought it was hilarious and now it's a running joke.

I played "Space Trash" and "5 Stages of Infatuation," both of which don't receive a ton of play. (Possibly because I'm not playing out a ton right now.)

Well, so I have three FAWM 2012 songs right now. I took off from work on February 1, and basically just wrote for many hours. I recorded Kaleidescope Heart (mp3) and The Stinkbug Song (mp3). Stinkbug's part of a request from a co-worker, and it's some of my best banjo work/writing to date. Kaleidescope Heart was my "first fruits" song. Essentially, just dedicated to God. I do pray for all my songs to belong to God and to be centered in His love, but this'd be just a special dedication. The really cool thing about first fruits this year is that some of us FAWMers got to talking about it in the forums - a whole big long thread of really excellent and articulate discourse on worship and the place of music in church and with God. I said that I do this first fruits thing, and a few people picked it up and tagged their songs as "first-fruits," so you can filter songs by that tag and see who did it and what they wrote. Really awesome. I love what they wrote. I was really blessed by what they wrote. :)

Okay, so... there's a ton of really excellent talent that signed on with FAWM this year. We should have a really excellent couple of showcases in March. I'm also personally just really pleased because there are several new lady singer-songwriters, and, y'know, I'm totally fine hanging out with guys, but, it's nice to balance things out a little.

Nuff said.

Then today I wrote Keep in Mind (mp3), which is actually my favorite so far, because while I guess it came out sort of mysterious, it makes complete and total sense to me and it is the combination of my heart and God's heart for me. I wrote most of the lyrics in the grocery store parking lot. The lyrics just began to come to me as I was driving, and then I just had to sit and write them out before they fled.

That's one thing I'm enjoying about February. I know that it's time to buckle down and write songs. So you just do it. You take an hour in the parking lot to get the lyrics down. You spend Friday night in amid offers to go out. You just know that the songs need writing, and you balance everything with that when you can. I really enjoy the focus. I wish the other 11 months of the year had similar things... and, granted, they probably will. Soon.

FAWM 2012!

Here we are again. Another February, another FAWM.

That's February Album Writing Month!



I've completed two FAWMs already. This is my third year writing, and my second year organizing. I've had the distinct pleasure of co-organizing with Michael (Battleshy Youths) (Honey Badgers). We're a well-oiled organizational team. Joining us in the effort so far are Todd Chappelle and Aaron Nathans.

Sometimes, it's a little surreal.

The organizing, I mean.

Do you remember the moment when you grew up and realized you could eat bacon WHENEVER YOU WANTED?

That's kind of like this.

The response is incredible. Very few people I've talked to have said no to FAWM. Seven new Delawareans joined this year along with a few folks I know from Philly, and one of our new Delawareans managed to recruit some folks - without even having started FAWM himself.

It ain't a numbers game, though. I just love to cultivate creativity. People have these kernels and grains of the stuff, and sometimes they let it grow and sometimes they don't. I'll tell you one thing: a garden's a sorry place with just one flower.

Pretty soon, we'll embark. We'll be at the inDEpendence musician network on Monday; they meet at Extreme Pizza once a month for the sole purpose of strengthening Delaware's music community. Then we'll be on Graffiti Radio on Tuesday at 8 pm! Listen online by clicking through to that link. Wednesday, I'm taking off work and writing music all day. ;)

Showcase details forthcoming. Yep yep yep. For more info, check out the website or the facebook page for all the happenin's of FAWM in the Delaware area.

'Nother great open mic (and sundry other things)

We had another open mic right here at my place. It was really snazzy, and it made me feel awesomely about the human race. Or at least, the humans I know personally who play music up in this here part of the world. It's not really an open mic... it's a gathering of friends and friendly people who just wanna play music and support other people playing music. The balance can be tricky since I think we had somewhere from 8-10 people who wanted to play, and I want everyone to be able to play as many songs as they want, but it never works out that way. I'm convinced we need to just take a camping trip in the wilderness and play music all weekend.

Honestly, though. I've never been a huge fan of TV and it actually kind of irritates me. Groucho Marx has a quote that resonates deeply with me: "I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book." I have been convinced for a long time that when people hang out together by watching television, they're actually not. Their consciousnesses are suspended inside the television or some other realm entirely. Time spent watching television, generally, is time... lost. In my own humble opinion. I just felt like people desiring to spend time together should actually spend time together, like playing games, talking, eating, or musicking. And last night was a really rich time of hanging out and connecting.

Oh, anyway. Other things that are going on...worship, and writing. I think I'm about to embark on a tune-writing voyage. Last Sunday, someone prayed for me and they said I'd be hearing a lot from God and pushing it out in song form. I already hear from God a lot (I actually have a book that I write down stuff I hear, which this person had no clue) so it's just a matter of opening myself up to obey. And honestly, I think that means fasting from... music in the car, music on youtube, etc. Because I'm always listening too loud or just getting absorbed (my consciousness is in the music, so to speak), and really, when you think about it - driving in the car is the perfect time to just sing whatever. Write songs out loud. So... I'll try it. I'll try it. That's all I can do.

(It's not bad to listen to music, obviously - there are times to absorb and times to release music, and I think I need to focus on releasing instead of absorbing, if that makes sense.)

I might sign up for 50/90, an offshoot of FAWM, just so I can see how much I'll write in this time. I do not anticipate actually writing 50 songs in 90 days, but why not see how far I can go? That's how I started with FAWM...

Been doing some worship with Wilmington church, and that's awesome. I also went to a sweet worship kinship that they set up at church, and had a blast 'cause it's a safe place to try out using the banjo with worship tunes (I know, banjo in CHURCH?!) I'm looking forward to seeing what God's gonna do with that.

Lessons are starting up again in a week... looking forward to that, too.

I need to be getting my butt in gear about recording, but Shane gave me some good advice and I'm still meditating on it. He said, write too many songs and then choose from those. Problem is I don't think I have "too many songs" yet. And then, I don't know if I need to record just nature songs, just folk songs, or some odd amalgamation of the two. It could be nice to focus them that way. Blargh, I dunno.

I'm gonna go hang some laundry and go to sleep. Got church in the morning ^^

FAWM post #10: +1, and an article in The News Journal!

"Crowns"




Some songs I struggle to compose. I put a lot of thought into the chords, the melodies, the lyrics. This one just fell right out of the sky. I'm very happy with this one, and it'll make its way into my rotation, but it may not be one of the top-played. My comedic and more upbeat stuff tends to get more play (because who doesn't like feeling good?), but I do need songs like this in the rotation.


ALSO, and this is a big ALSO, The News Journal just put out an article today about FAWM and us Delaware songwriters. Featured are myself, Michael, and Todd. There are some very nice photos to go along with this well-written article -- it's definitely worth the read.

Click here to read the article!

I've only got two more to fill the quota, but I'm just gonna write until there's no more February.

FAWM post #8: EPIC WIN (with Michael Natrin) and Valentine's Day

I just love this. I just love this. I can't say how much I freakin' love this. Yeah sure, it's not perfect and I botched a few things, but hey, who gives a crap when you have SO MUCH WIN.

(Hey, check out the rest of Michael's FAWM songs! They're awesome!)


A few short minutes after I saw this for the first time, I stopped spazzing out and headed over to Mojo Main for another fabulous open mic. I was betting on getting a spot near the beginning on account of it was Valentine's Day. It's probably Newark's best open mic. I don't really say things are great unless they really impress me, so rest assured: IT'S GREAT.

And I was right about getting a spot near the beginning, which was good. I thought to myself, hey, self! You could, like, go home if you wanted, and get some sleep!

And then I didn't leave 'till like 1 AM. I have this notion that being a singer-songwriter is pretty much not conducive to sleeping ever. And I am comfortable with this. Except for when it's 8 AM, at which point I am too busy telling myself what an idiot I am for staying out late again.

FAWM post #7: Collab weekend

A note on collaboration. I have not developed any sort of collaborative skill up to this point. None. You may recall that one thing I loved about guitar was that I could be a one-woman band - no need for other musicians.

So, yep, I'm a collaboration newbie. But I have learned to play well with others since I started learning guitar all those years ago, and I did okay as a collaborator this weekend (if I may say so myself).

Saturday I met up with Zach and we did some jamming. This is what we came up with:



I guess we're calling it "Irish Platypus," because we couldn't think of a better name. I do believe we're taking suggestions, though. We thought there might be lyrics, but we didn't write any. So far I have found that writing lyrics with other people to be an extremely awkward experience. Writing music, pretty okay. Writing words with someone else terrifies the living snot out of me.

But me and Michael wrote a song today with words. It was good. It sprang up out of an idea I was incubating. At first I thought this might be cheating, in terms of collaborating, but I now think that it probably helps to come to a collab session with a few ideas in mind. I hope you'll get to hear our sweet song soon, but I also hope that the poor guy isn't driving himself crazy on the other side of this small town trying to do schoolwork, fix up the recording, and throw on a mandolin solo. Cripes. No one needs that kind of stress.


Anyway, I also just wrote this puppy... partially for the occasion (it is, after all, Valentine's Day as of this writing). Title: "The Five Stages of Infatuation"




I'm a little nervous about it. I may end up pulling it, honestly. I can't quite stick my finger on why it makes me so nervous (possibly sleep-deprivation as well as simply being the worrier that I am), so until I can, I'll just... leave it. It's like the line in the Automatic Toilet Song where I claim that the toilet is demon-possessed. I don't exactly feel 100% comfy with it. There are people in the world who really did not appreciate that line. But... I don't know, I can't please everyone when it comes down to it.

This song is really intended as a caricature and a satire of what really happens in the pursuit of romance - I guess I just don't want someone running off with it thinking that I glorified jealousy and things like that. 'Cause obviously, I don't condone stuff like that. I want to lift people up. I guess my hope is that this song helps to entertain, and make light of some of the normal and healthy aspects about being single, but maybe also help reveal how insane it is to obsess about stuff like this.

Well, whatever. I don't think I have any more time today to devote to worrying about it, so you let me know if I'm crazy or not. Okay?

FAWM post #1: the calm before the FAWM

If you missed my intro to FAWM post... ya might wanna catch up.

I have latched onto this FAWM thing like a tick in a dog's ear and I'm not letting go. The proposal, boiled-down, is "hey, let's all write a crapton of music at the same time, and encourage each other while we do it." This is my own philosophy, but when you find a good thing, YOU DON'T LET GO.

Because I feel so snazzy about the whole thing, I'm doing quite a bit of proselytizing. I reckon I'm getting a bit annoying by now, but I'm absolutely shameless. The number one response: "oh, I'm too busy." "I have a lot going on in February."

I interpret this in one of two ways.

Interpretation Number 1: Person is probably not really digging the idea, and/or is annoyed by my constant nagging to do FAWM. Person is trying to find a way to let me down gently and the "busy" excuse always seems to do the trick.

Interpretation Number 2: Person really digs the idea, wants to write music, loves the idea of an encouraging community. Person, however, also has bills to pay.

If you're reading this and you fall into the second category, I have three words for you.

Just.

Do.

It.

Because if you truly feel called to do something (anything!), chances are it will be exciting, enlivening, educational, edifying - but it will not be easy. You'll probably trade in some of your comforts and your complacency. Comfort is great; living the adventure is better.

I fully expect to arrive at March 1st with a sleep deficit, a messy house, some folks I've offended for lack of visitation, and (God willing) 14 brand new songs with which to edify, educate, and commiserate with others. Plus an ever-widening community of local songwriters, some of whom I've hopefully helped to encourage along the way. Plus some new collaborators and partners-in-crime.

Folks who ask, "how can you do that?" are looking only at the first three things I've listed. Looking at the sum total makes me ask in reply, "how could I not?"

Just reminds me of this Hunter S. Thompson quote, one that I think pretty well describes my approach to life, faith, and everything else:

"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!"



(click here to check out my current progress on FAWM.org)

FAWM: going after inspiration... with a club.

Michael and I are trying to gather together Delaware (and Delaware-area) songwriters to participate in FAWM, or February Album Writing Month. It's a songwriting challenge; write 1 song every 2 days in February, you end up with 14 songs (about an album's worth).

I managed to complete this challenge last year, and it was amazing. I already had a good pile of songs, but most of my current original repertoire is a direct result of FAWM. The thing that snagged me about FAWM, and the thing that kept me going, was the supportive online community they've built up around it. FAWMers are great -- they come from all different countries and all types of musical backgrounds. They'll listen to your stuff online and give you honest, constructive feedback (if you like).

Online is good, but... I've always been big on community, and I've always been big on music. I don't think we'll ever be sorry we tried to bring together a group of local artists to encourage and hone one another. Nope. Never.

And that's why we're doin' it. Please consider becoming a part of this growing community of artists and songwriters, even if you don't think you can do FAWM.

For more info, check out this site that Michael threw together. Or check us out on facebook!

(Plus, you can watch me through the month of February as I tackle the challenge myself...)

People Who Have Songs

Playing Tate Street Coffee was a great deal of fun. Many thanks to everyone who came, including the gentlemen who are collectively the Space-O-Nots, who sat right in front and sang along to Jonathan Coulton's "Re: Your Brains" and "The Horseshoe Crab Song" (an original, of course).

I admit that this was my first... well, my first "real" gig as "Em, the singer/songwriter." I'm not sure exactly why it qualifies as "real," it just... does. Playing for an hour on my own in a public establishment... I've done it before, but only as a classical guitarist. It's never been an hour of my own stuff.

Nervous? Yeah. About my playing? No. Mostly I was nervous about the fact that I was unleashing my own writing on the world. Playing classical repertoire is a much different experience... you end up playing stuff by a lot of dead white guys. Sometimes they're not dead yet. Sometimes they're not guys. But mostly, yeah, dead white guys. Not your own stuff. The stuff that's your own is the technique and the interpretation of the music. And trust me, it's not that people are not judging -- people are totally judging. People can (and will) tear you a new one over technique and interpretation.

Playing your own stuff... flawless technique is nice, but you can interpret your own music however you want. People are judging your playing by a different standard, maybe trying to relate, maybe just appreciating the musicality of it... maybe listening to the poetry of the words (if applicable). So while I'm used to the stage... it's a whole different world.

And I think that I think too much about what people think. I have songs, and I've watched other people who also have songs -- more or less studied them and tried to find out what it is that people with songs do.

• People who have songs tend to showcase said songs, usually doggedly.
  
• These songs tend to become precious to the communities in which the person belongs.
  
• Occasionally, a person who has songs will rise into the consciousness of wider and wider communities,
  
• but the common thread running through all people with songs is that they never cared much about that bit. They only had their songs and a desire to share.
  

I guess I always had songs, but I never much had the desire for sharing 'till now. If I had to guess, I would say I probably only have God to blame for that. I can't logic it out how it comes to be that desire grows where no desire has ever grown before, or how love multiplies in a world that seems to crush love underfoot at every turn. All I know is, it does.